How couples navigate credit card rewards

Here at Bankrate, many of us are slightly obsessed with earning and redeeming credit card points, miles and cash back. And some of us pool our points, miles and cash with spouses or significant others — even if they aren’t quite as invested in the credit cards game as we are.

In the rewards community, we’re referred to as ‘Player One,’ while our less-engaged partners are known as ‘Player Two’. To understand how Player Ones and Player Twos can work together to get maximum value from their credit cards — minus the obsession — I interviewed four Player Twos on their relationships and rewards strategies.

A balanced cash back approach

Number of cards: 3

How they track: Sticky notes

Primary goal: Accumulate cash back

Payments, not rewards

Chelsea Rossman, wife of Ted Rossman, Bankrate senior industry analyst, says she opened her first credit card — a Capital One cash back card — in April 2001, before her husband did. “I was a junior in high school. I wanted a credit card to pay for various purchases,” she says. “Obtaining the credit card then was directly in line with starting my first real job. I did not view it so much as a pathway to rewards, but rather as a form of payment.”

Chelsea and Ted met a little over a year later, in 2002, as freshmen at Colgate University. “My husband got his first credit card in the summer of 2003, the same one as me, at my recommendation,” she says.

She also acquired some store cards over the ensuing years, including a Neiman Marcus card in 2006 (since at the time, they didn’t accept Visa and Mastercard) and an Ann Taylor card in 2011. “The Ann Taylor card was to offset a large purchase. However, I rarely used either of the store cards, whereas I used the Capital One card frequently. I have not gotten a store card since and those accounts are now closed,” she says.

“While he and I dabbled in exchanging credit card points for gift cards and other physical rewards around 2007-2011, his interest in credit cards grew when he started working for the PR department of Bankrate in 2011,” says Chelsea. “In 2011, we got a Chase Freedom* card and, in 2013, a Blue Cash Everyday® Card from American Express.” The Freedom card is no longer available; however, the Chase Freedom Flex^®* is a similar option.

Fitting interests and needs

Over time, the Rossmans continued discussing which credit cards would best help with their cash back rewards strategy. In 2013, the Bankrate PR team began working with The Points Guy, which further piqued Ted’s interest in credit cards, says Chelsea. “In 2018, he became a spokesperson for CreditCards.com. By that time, he was well positioned to speak about credit card rewards,” she says. “During this time, he would talk to me actively about his growing interest in the industry.”

The Rossmans currently have three credit cards. “The Chase Freedom Flex and the Blue Cash Preferred® Card from American Express both have Ted as the primary account holder,” she says. “We also have a Wells Fargo Active Cash® Card, where I am the primary account holder.”

Cheat sheet maximizer

Around 2011, Ted began telling Chelsea which cards offered the best rewards in which categories. “However, as it could be confusing at times, it became clear that a visual aid would work better,” she says. “So he would take a picture of all the cards with sticky notes describing which one was better in each category. It was my cheat sheet to maximize the proper use of the cards.”

“He also lets me know from time to time if I should use other forms of payment for a certain quarter or category,” says Chelsea. “This can often be tackled by changing the default card on certain online accounts and then changing it back when the rewards shift.”

Chelsea found that it has really helped her to not have too many cards and to have a single card that works well for most everything. Because the Rossmans focus on cash back cards, there’s rarely a major redemption all at once, but it does add up. “Even in the earlier days of receiving a gift card here or there, it felt significant,” says Chelsea. “However, as our family has grown, so has our spending, so the cash back rewards have become larger over time as well.”

Conscientious about cards

Number of cards: 4

How they track: Follow card bonus categories

Primary goal: Pay for travel

Rebekah Wilson, partner of Bankrate senior credit cards editor Harlan Vaughn, says that before meeting him, she worked in social services, noting her exposure to any financial products, including credit cards, was limited. “I viewed them more as a liability than an asset,” says Wilson.

“I learned about his credit card acumen almost immediately upon meeting him,” she says. “It has always been partnered with his love of travel, and I quickly understood it as his means to travel comfortably and within budget.”

Wilson’s family uses four credit cards, with her as an authorized user:

Wilson and Vaughn view the benefits of credit cards mostly in the context of travel, says Wilson. “After the first trip together, I definitely saw how access to a lounge or an upgrade makes travel a lot more enjoyable. That first stay in a luxury hotel was enough for me.”

“It will take years — and not parenting tiny babies — before I catch up to Harlan’s level of expertise,” says Wilson. “But I am conscientious about using the correct card for maximum benefit.”

Sold on points and miles

Number of cards: 13

How they track: Spreadsheets and redemption matrices

Primary goal: Pay for luxury travel

Babatunde Onadele Jr., husband of Bankrate contributor Ashley Onadele, says his knowledge of credit cards before meeting his wife, on a scale of one to 10, was a two. “I only knew about collecting points and the general steps to do so with credit cards,” he says.

He met his wife in high school. “On our first trip together, Ashley brought up the idea of using points and miles,” he says. “But once we got married, she took credit card points and miles to the next level, using spreadsheets and redemption matrices, to keep track of it all.”

Babatunde was sold after that first trip and pledged to play his role. “I did my part by checking credit card portals for items I planned to purchase to see if I could squeeze points out of it,” he says. “I also ensured that my rewards numbers were attached to all the traveling and accommodations accounts I did for work.”

The Onadele family has the following credit cards:

“As we expanded our family with our son and then shortly thereafter our daughter, I felt the difference when we traveled,” he says. “Ashley showed me the joys through our travel experiences that I had never considered, visiting places like Thailand, Amsterdam, Austria and Switzerland, [along with] luxury boutique hotels and traveling in business class.”

Great expectations, great rewards

Number of cards: 55

How they track: Spreadsheets

Primary goal: Pay for travel

Danielle Flanigan, wife of credit cards writer Ryan Flanigan, says she initially had very little knowledge about credit card points, miles and cash back. “I knew that I could use them when I didn’t have cash on hand and that I needed to pay it off every month.”

According to Danielle, Ryan’s focus on credit cards first came to light on their honeymoon. “I was like, ‘How can we afford this? How did we do this?’” she says. “He said, ‘This is the joy of points and miles.’ And that’s when I started to learn a little bit about it.”

When it comes to the family’s credit cards, Ryan has a binder with 55 — yes, 55 — credit cards. “The credit cards I use change regularly based on whether I need to pursue a sign-up bonus, quarterly or yearly spending milestones, whether I need points in certain programs or want cash back,” he says.

Danielle says she’s caught on to the credit cards game — but not to the same extent as Ryan. “It [took] maybe a year before I really started to care so much about what points were,” she says. “But now I definitely impress upon my friends and family to never use cash and always use a credit card to get points for your purchases. When we go on trips leaving the continental U.S., I have this expectation that we are going to fly some kind of business class and stay in some kind of suite or bougie hotel.”

Create a couples game plan

The couples profiled above came up with their own game plans to maximize the cash back, points or miles they earn on their credit cards, but you and your spouse or significant other will want to create your own Player One and Two strategy.

• Decide what’s more important to you and your partner: cash back or travel rewards. The Rossmans have a growing family and cash back is their priority. However, the Onadeles love to travel, so it makes sense that they focus on cards that offer points and miles to let them do that.
• Do your research on the card issuers that can help you reach your goals. Vaughn and Wilson decided that three different issuers — American Express, Capital One and U.S. Bank — offer them the perfect balance they need to fund their travel.
• Find a way to track the cash back, points and miles you’re earning on each card to get everyone on the same page. This can be as simple as using sticky notes to indicate which cards to use for different purchases to earn maximum rewards. Apps such as The Points Guy, AwardWallet and MaxRewards can also do the work for you. All three apps have free versions, but AwardWallet Plus costs $49.99 a year, while MaxRewards Gold is $96 a year (increasing to $108 a year on June 29, 2025). 

Babatunde’s best trick for keeping track of which cards to use is to ask his wife. “I value her expertise on credit cards and miles, so when I am between two cards for a purchase, I will get a gut-check from her,” he says. “Even our friends and family utilize her as a resource, so I would be silly not to.”

Danielle asks her husband what card to use every single time she makes a purchase. “I usually don’t buy anything until he tells me which credit card to use.”

“Harlan is good at sharing his knowledge about which cards are best for what categories,” says Wilson. “And if I forget, the answer is just a text away or in the next room.”

For the Rossmans, the best tools have been communicating about which credit card to use, says Chelsea. “We find having credit cards that meet our needs and lifestyle, having few credit cards and having a main credit card to use works best for us.”

The bottom line

Some of us redeem points/miles for travel, while others are all about that cash. These four couples have different ways of tracking points, miles and cash back for redemptions — but they all prioritize keeping Player Two in sync.

No matter what you plan to get out of your credit card rewards, make sure you have a system in place to ensure you and your Player Two are using the right cards for your goals. Doing so will ensure that you’re able to earn and redeem points, miles and cash back to maximum effect.

The information about the Chase Freedom, Chase Freedom Flex^®, United^SM Explorer Card, Marriott Rewards® Premier Plus Credit Card, Marriott Rewards® Premier Plus Credit Card, Citi® / AAdvantage® Platinum Select® World Elite Mastercard® and Citi^® / AAdvantage Business^TM World Elite Mastercard® has been collected independently by Bankrate. The card details have not been reviewed or approved by the issuer.